Dating in this day and age is not for the faint of heart. The dating pool is full of self-absorbed, entitled people with bad intentions. HoweverI like to think there are some kind, caring individuals mixed in with the crap. In fact, despite what social media might tell you, I have know there are plenty of good fish in the sea. It may just take time and judgment to find them.
If you’re in the dating scene and looking for a real connection, you’re in the right place. Here are five green flags that someone is actually worth dating.
1. They ask you thought-provoking questions
Have you ever been on a date with someone who only answered your questions or talked about themselves? Yes, it’s exhausting to sit back and listen to someone go on and on about how ~awesome~ their life is, how ~cool~ their friends are, and how ~enlightened~ the latest self-help book made them – without them ever asking you a single question.
Don’t get me wrong: these can all be good conversations, but only if the energy is reciprocated. If someone actually wants to get to know you, they will ask you thoughtful questions about your life, your passions, and your dating wants/needs.
2. They respect your boundaries
Your boundaries will quickly weed out the wrong people, so don’t be afraid to set them early. Someone who respects you and your wants, needs, values, morals and comfort is someone worth trusting. Don’t continue to date someone who consistently pushes back your boundaries or makes you feel uncomfortable in any way, as this will likely only get worse over time.
3. They are consistent
Consistency is not always easy to find today. Many people will present themselves as the best version of themselves in the first few weeks or months of dating, only to become complacent (or worse) as the relationship progresses.
When dating, look for someone who is consistent in small ways, as they are more likely to be consistent in bigger ways as well. For example, if they consistently communicate with you throughout the day, schedule dates without canceling at the last minute, and bring the same energy to your conversations (no push-and-pull tendencies), take that as a green flag.
4. They are true to their word
It’s easy to spew a million promises or talk a big talk, but actions speak far louder than words. If someone actually follows through on the promises they make, they may actually be worth dating. You want to invest in those who invest in you, so it’s crucial to choose someone who shows (not tells) you how much they care.
5. They bring you peace
So many people mistake a rush of adrenaline for chemistry when it could actually be a sign that your nervous system is being triggered by this person. Your body tends to know if someone is safe or good for you before you know logically.
Look for that person who gives you peace so that you can feel relaxed in their presence. Attraction and chemistry can build over time, but peace is hard to find.
